Kill the person above you.

[Saif_Mahlik]

In this thread the aim is to write a sentence or two about how you would kill the person above you, or even a paragraph on how you would do it. This is just for fun, so you can write things that maybe out of the ordinary.

Let the games begin!

[Sardte]

I would ban your forum account

[DurriaL]

I win.

[Ninijutsu]

Charge Charge Charge Charge Charge Charge

Punch

Flex Flex Flex Flex Flex

Punch

Flex Flex

Val Strike

[lawton]

I would unlock your cellar door and take you outside. The sight of other humans would kill you.

[LadyGoo]

I'd just say "Hello, I'm Lady Goo"

[lawton]

I'd just say "Hello, I'm Lady Goo"

Sit on my face.

I have asked this 6 times

[englishman]

im friends with Chuck Norris

[painhertz]

I would ban your forum account

[MightySheep]

I'd go through all your forum posts and try to get as much information about you as possible

and I'd use the public information you have listed

'Location:Louisiana
Age:38
Occupation:Computer repair'

and search the net for matches on your username or email address either manually or with search functions like pipl.com

If necessary, I'd have to learn how to hack website to retrieve your sensitive non-public personal information from sites or applications that you are registered with, most likely via sql injections which I already partly know

I'd also find out IP address easily enough which should confirm if the location is indeed Louisiana

I'd use different accounts and personas, try to befriend you as multiple different people to gather more information, like anything that would tell me your location or perhaps people you know irl -- hopefully I would be able to add you on Facebook and find out what you look like / who your friends or family are, of course I would do this all anonymously making sure I'm completely untraceable which is not so hard and make sure not to say anything too inquisitive or obvious on any platforms that could be being logged like msn

Once I find out your location and what you look like I would travel there and to begin with, stalk you- when the opportunity is perfect (alone, dark) I would go in for the quiet kill, perhaps using chloroform first or just straight knife from behind and be fully masked, wearing cheap, black clothes which I would burn shortly afterwards

Put you in my car and bring you back to my place where I would go all Dexter style with shrink-wrapped room and chainsaw, then dump the pieces out in sea or somewhere never to be found

There would be no evidence, I would never be a suspect because I don't live anywhere nearby nor do I have a motive and the police wouldn't even be able to confirm if he was even dead or alive and would have zero leads to go off

I would not use any credit cards nor let there be any public record of my trip and I would arrange an alibi just to be safe

seems easy enough