A Hearthling Limerick

[Blaze]

How about one about the player that people love to hate?
It's from a Bottlenecker's point of view, but I thought it would suit it; from a purely satirical point of view.

I'll tattle a tale that is totally true,
Started out as a nothing, but suddenly grew,
It deals with a man, a town, and a ring,
So settle on in and my song I shall sing.

It happened one day in a ring by a farm,
A sudden event that will cause great alarm,
How could a place that's abundant with charm,
Create such a bastard that brings so much harm.

Anger and rage is what you'll get,
When he comes for you and the riches you've set,
his e-peen is large and it's easy to see,
that this is the tale of Jay-Tee-Gee.

Jay-Tee-Gee, O' Jay-Tee-Gee,
Your acts are stupid and heinous.
Why do you keep on bothering me?
You really must be an a~nus.

O' Jay-Tee-Gee, it's easy to see,
The anger you leave is raining on thee,
The items are dropped and the riches are missed,
And the steel is all gone and the people are pissed.

And if they ever should find the fool,
string him up-side-down by his tool.
Then spin him around until he get's sick,
One! Two!
That should suit the prick.

Jay-Tee-Gee, O' Jay-Tee-Gee,
the rage that you cause is high class.
Why do you keep on bothering me?
You really must be a dumbass.

Jay-Tee-Gee, O' Jay-Tee-Gee,
The anger you cause is widespread.
Why do you keep on bothering me?
You really must be a ... wiener.

Now everyone knows about the blood and the sin,
at the starting ring near the farm by the inn.
And should someone happen to see you near,
they'll rip off your nuts and serve them with beer.

So one final thought, before I depart,
and this, my friends, comes straight from the heart.
We'd all be fine if it weren't for this prick,
and that GAME-CRASHING WANKER that started this schtick.

[Raephire]

I travel the world and attack with bare fist
bears, foxes and people their attacks have all missed
I once sought strong creatures, my actions were rash
I left the map boundary and the server did crash.

[kaka]

What's this, O Jorb? Say, is it poo?
Indeed it is, now you'll need a loo.
Oh jolly, what fun!
Can we poop on the run?
Of course you can. You can throw it too.

[Morsigil]

The Smith

With dark ore the land is well frought,
I'd turn it to cast-iron I thought,
After tea in my room,
I came back to bloom,
And with a swing of my hammer it was wrought.

The Strangler
Once there was a man named The Strangler,
Of foxes and rabbits he was a mangler,
He'd wring their thin necks,
Filling baskets by the peck,
Until a bear made it safer to be The Angler.

[Ferinex]

There once was a forum of untouched beauty
The posters all had a sense of duty
Then came the trolls and the goons
Turned all sorts of maroons
The boards were forever moot-y

[kaka]

Oh wow! I had almost forgot this thread :D
It would sure be a shame to leave it dead
Well, no ideas now (have to tend to my cow :P)
I'll think up some more when I go to bed

[Josan]

Join the Army

There was a bad hearthling but then he turned good,
due to warfare and justice and blocks of small wood,
he wanted to make an army to fight,
the evil Waynevillians with glee and delight.

This hearthling now requests a group,
to fight this enemy by flinging poop,
if you wish to join then send him a message,
if not consider yourself a lessage.

Becuase together the Waynevillians shall fall,
by the blood stained blade of Gaul,
with the help of Xanadu and the rest of you,
we can make the lands of Hearth once more like new.

To be free of the tyranny of the Waynevillians,
would to be like having dollars worth a million,
so I ask you all to join this hearthlings cause,
to make this world at peace and at law.

What? You ask for his name?,
his name is known mostly in vain,
but since I have nothing to rhyme,
I'll just say it out loud with a great chime...
JOSAN

[warrri]

None of your rhymes could make me smile
no funny punchlines and no style
thats why i shout out loud and clear
BAN FÜR ALLE ÜBER MIR.

[NaoWhut]

Edit.

[Asmodeus]

Naos doesn't even rhyme,
bar keep the time,
dude, its not a race,
post in the right place,
and Warri, you forgot the fifth line.