i honestly think that haven does have a steep learning curve, but thats not really the problem in this case.
this is more a issue of casual vs hardcore.
Haven really isn't nearly as casual as it seems to be.
I mean you can certainly pick it up with a brand new character, after a hour or two figuring things out you might have a nice little homestead, maybe you are starting to farm and wondering where you could get all the stuff you need to make all these things you see you can make... But in reality, casual players can easily be destroyed by people who have spent far more time [i assume in this case they have, since they can destroy pallicades].. Really only other players who have spent far more time [call it hardcore players in time not effort perhaps], can stop each other. Casual players can indeed hide somewhere out in the wilds off any major routes, and hope not to be found, but thats really only a hope.
Now on first impression what i said may sound like i am calling this a bad thing, but i don't really agree. From my perspective, a group of marauding bandits attacked a bunch of innocent colonists just setting up their nice new town... which sounds pretty cool. I know that many people find it painful.. but it's one of the things i like about this game.. that this sort of thing can happen. I'm not saying some nice people shouldn't scream vengence and track em down, i'm merely saying i like this level of harshness.
No doubt this sounds coloured coming from someone in my position [have a established village, relatively strong], however i assure you not only have i been stolen from many, many times, [some of which i managed to punish, others i didn't], i have also been attacked many times, and been near death on occasion. Most of these events broke up the tediusness and boredom that i generally feel after playing any game for any length of time. I would go so far to say that the majority of things that got me excited and that i will remember for a long time, were things that involved conflict, theft, vandalism and crime, whether done to me, by me, or where i was a 3rd party taking a side.
I agree this game is disadvantagous for casual gaming [and god knows we need a tutorial and some sort of way to ease newbies into the game], but the reasons for those disadvantages also create the very reasons why this game has managed to keep me interested after months of playing.