Hi,
Yeah, can be hard. Some advice:
(1) Look for the names of villages near you, post them here. This could help people give you your coordinates.
(2) Look for distinctive features like large lakes, mountains, swamps - look for them on the world map:
http://www.algeralith.info/HavenMap/ . The best thing to find is the edge of the map, that will help you find your position much more easily

(3) Once you have found your position, you could make a post here saying where you are (only say approximately, or people will perhaps hunt you down), and if anyone else is nearby.
(4) Otherwise, you could make a post asking to join a village in the Dwarves and Thieves forum. That will be an easy way to find others to play with.