Diary of Amish Explorer

[FearTheAmish]

(slightly dramatized but most of the stuff is close to what happened i am a new player to HnH that came here from Salem)

This is the diary of the wanderings and exploration of the great cartographer Amish the Explorer. This diary contains the findings and day to day life of a cartographer of the highest caliber.

Day 1

Wow this place is amazing i spawned in a beautiful broad leaf forest. Unfortunately the wildlife does not seem friendly... within 10 minutes of finding an apple tree and deciding to take a short break to eat lunch i was assaulted by a GIANT WILD BOAR! i swear it was at least 6 feet tall and weighed 300 lbs. but as i was saying i was eating lunch and suddenly i heard snorting from a bush so i decided to investigate by throwing an apple core at the bush. This was a terrible idea because suddenly a 8ft tall 500 lbs boar came charging out! luckily as a witty and capable woodsman i knew what to do... run like a little girl screaming for a river. luckily i made it just seconds before the 10ft tall 800lbs boar could catch me and dived into the water. After a while it became bored with snorting at me and wandered off. I then continued my wandering and mapping, studying the plants and animals around me. i was able to map a significant portion of this forest but i found myself spending an inordinate amount of time studying this pine cone cow i made, seriously its a pine cone that looks like a cow this thing is amazing.

Day 2

Today i was getting really hungry but luckily i found an Ant hill. I know if someone finds this diary they might be a little more squeamish then I, but any good outdoors man realizes that ants are not only delicious but nutritious. The problem is getting around the guard ants, once again as a witty and capable outdoors man i know the solution.

Step 1 approach the Hill and hit it with a stick
Step 2 when guard ants attack you run like a little girl for a river and dive in
Step 3 for some reason ants around here then become confused and just wander around
Step 3 get your self some delicious ants

I was amazingly lucky not only did i find a few Ant larva but also a queen and a soldier! i promptly took both of them and studied them for a few hours (i still can't quiet figure out why it took me a few hours to study an ant but i always apply myself completely to a task!) I swore after just sleeping on the ground last night i would create some shelter for tonight. So i spent the rest of the evening creating a Leanto and a spruce bed. Luckily i had found a coniferous forest right next to the broad leaf forest and was able to make a nice little temporary home with a Leanto, bed, and a fence. This place will act as my headquarters while i map out the rest of the area.

Day 3

Dear Christ i heard the scariest sound ever today. I decided my diet of ants and apples need a little meat to supplement it. I had started mapping the coniferous forest today and while moving around i saw it, a wee lil rabbit and i had to have it. I started to sneak towards it with a rock in hand then snapped a twig i froze hoping not to spook it, but strangely it completely ignored me. Then i realized it this rabbit had no fear of humans, so i dropped the rock and just walked over and picked it up. It looked up at me with innocent bunny eyes and i snapped its neck, it seriously sounded like someone dropped an anvil on a turtle. But it was my tastiest dinner to date, and i found a wish bone which i intently studied for a few hours.

Day 4

I MADE A BOAT!

To be continued.....

[overtyped]

(slightly dramatized but most of the stuff is close to what happened i am a new player to HnH that came here from Salem)

This is the diary of the wanderings and exploration of the great cartographer Amish the Explorer. This diary contains the findings and day to day life of a cartographer of the highest caliber.

Day 4

I MADE A BOAT!

To be continued.....

I call bullshit on this thread, everyone knows that a boat is way too much technology for the amish, there's no way it would be approved by the amish counsel. A true man of god would never touch such foul pagan devices. You sir are a fraud, repent ye sinner, and may god have mercy on your hedonistic soul.

[jonamaster]

inb4 "YOU CAME FROM SALEM, SHAME ON YOU!!"
Nah, just kidding, welcome to HnH!

I wanna see how long can you protect your boat lol, oh and please go and donwload Enders client if you don't wanna die by a bear

[FearTheAmish]

inb4 "YOU CAME FROM SALEM, SHAME ON YOU!!"
Nah, just kidding, welcome to HnH!

I wanna see how long can you protect your boat lol, oh and please go and donwload Enders client if you don't wanna die by a bear

yeah had enders was a day or so before i figured out how to turn on the radius, and the boat has some funny stories.

[FearTheAmish]

(So i got a little ahead of myself with the boat comment so hold tight its coming)

Day 4

I found PEOPLE! real ones not like the ones i pretend my primitive dolls are to give me someone to talk to. While mapping the forest i heard some sounds up ahead and remembering the boar incident i decided to get sneaky... I found some spruces boughs and tied them together and put them on my head, now i look like a bush i don't know how much it will help but i feel really sneaky. So i snuck along on my belly and looked through some bushes and i saw it. A giant stone circle and inside of it was some people setting up camp. I know how people can be dangerous but i was so excited to see other people i jumped up and yelled... "HULLO! i am Amish the Explorer" this might not have been the best idea because they stared at me really funny and one started to ready his sling probably thinking because of my hat that i was a talking bush (now that would be something strange). But luckily i am trained in negotiations and convinced them that i was peaceful (mostly by putting up my hands and screaming "I SURRENDER I SWEAR I AM NOT A TALKING BUSH"). We got to talking and they ended up being really friendly. I traded them some mushrooms and tons of rabbit hides i had been holding onto for some leather which i promptly made into a backpack and bid them good day.

Day 5

found more people today these ones weren't so friendly. It all started with me mapping out some heath lands to the north. This time i didn't hear anything but i found some land that had been plowed and a house. I swear i wasn't going to steal anything i was just looking at the hides drying to see what type of animal they were for you know the mapping and stuff. When suddenly 2 naked men came running at me from across the field screaming " WE ARE FRIENDS WE JUST WANT A HUG!". I will be the first to admit that this scared the snot out of me, i mean seriously two naked men dongs a waving wanting to hug you? I ran like a scared little girl again but they kept following me screaming "HUGS!!". Luckily i got enough of a lead to get up a tree and hide they eventually stopped chasing me and let me go, but when i go to sleep i can still see them screaming "HUGS!" i think i have PTSD.

Day 6

SO after yesterdays insanity <shudders> i decided to go talk to the friendly people at the Stone Ring again. Their names are Smang This and SpaceJam, luckily they were still there because they were talking about moving. I pointed out how dangerous the world is and wondered if they wouldn't mind having a Cartographer of such stellar quality as me join them. Thankfully they said yes. So now i have joined a little crew they say in a few days they will be moving because the Stone Ring isn't safe. Best part is they help me make... A BOAT! Hell yeah! now i can map the ever loving shit outta this world.

To be Continued....

[Flame]

AHAHAH XD
free hugs..!!

And i died at the anvil+turtle part. THAT'S the best way i've read so far to describe that Sound!!XDDD

[jonamaster]

Amish, The Talking Bush

[Amanda44]

Day 6

SO after yesterdays insanity <shudders> i decided to go talk to the friendly people at the Stone Ring again. Their names are Smang This and SpaceJam, luckily they were still there because they were talking about moving. I pointed out how dangerous the world is and wondered if they wouldn't mind having a Cartographer of such stellar quality as me join them. Thankfully they said yes. So now i have joined a little crew they say in a few days they will be moving because the Stone Ring isn't safe. Best part is they help me make... A BOAT! Hell yeah! now i can map the ever loving shit outta this world.

To be Continued....

Hey FearTheAmish - funny stuff,

I'm also kinned to Smang and Spacejam - nice guys - you have a big problem though to the east of you! They have killed six of the ten ppl in the area, lol, so don't stay too long!

It's a lot quieter further east and some good biomes - good luck and keep safe!

[FearTheAmish]

Amish, The Talking Bush

think i am gonna make an alt named that now.

[TheOriginalFive]

Nice writing style. I found the talking bush part funny.