Raising my big black jigger mast

[ArvinJA]

I've been having troubles lately. When I get down to the harbor I see all these little white catboats from across the bar, and I try to raise my big black jigger mast to get to them, and don't get me wrong, I've been dressing down the sails regularly, but still, things never seem to go as planned, maybe because I've been doing the lazyjacks all wrong? This is far from my only problem. Oftentimes, I find that the ropes are all chafed, even though I worm, parcel and serve the cuntlines extensively, and try to cunt splice where appropriate. Now, sure, I do take a few shortcuts here and there. For instance, I have a huge lubber's hole on the bottom of my mizzentop, and I know that lots of seamen would mock me after having entered it. On the whole though, I think my fellow sailors enjoy what I'm doing, as I treat them to my Midshipman's nuts at every opportunity.

Now, there has been times where the ship has been pooped, and we've had waves crash hard into the poop deck, times where I've had to stick my head through the port hole and just puke. There has even been times where I have thought I would lose the stem of my ship, times where I thought my topmast would break. Now, you may accuse me of swinging the lamp, but all of this has happened, all of this is true.

Either way, I keep dreaming about V-hulls, maybe some day...

[min_the_fair]

Truefact: I work on a [pirate ship]. It has a bunch of fancy traditional sails with buntlines and clewlines.

You don't usually need to say the 'line' bit, so when handing a sail, the usual order you call out to the lovely people who've paid to come play on a pirate ship is 'haul away on bunts and clews'.

One of my colleagues is a Very Proper And Professional Lady, so knowing that one day she got so frazzled that she called out 'haul away on cunts and blues', is a thing that makes me giggle every time.

[MagicManICT]

Arvin drunk posting again? Interesting read, but I'm lost...