New CockHaven

[WarpedWiseMan]

We are looking for a few fun players. But in order to avoid confusion I will make this post with full disclosure.

First off, we don't want you. You should know that. You should also know that despite the name of our municipality, we are not gay. Well, not all of us.

We don't care about your stats or length of time playing. We don't want to tell you how to play or what to do. Respect of village property and goals is all we require.

Stop reading here if you demand your village has a mine, everyone has a certain stat level, you be given special status, or you type in leet speak/use smiley faces more than 10% of the time. We don't owe you anything. We don't care about your last village/hermit hut/life/world...etc.

There is a very high percentage chance we will kill you one to two days after you join. Especially if you ask for keys/gear/food etc. every other sentence in Village chat.

We don't use any chat features besides Village chat. We won't tell you not to use other communication methods, we just won't be there listening to you.

90% of us come from one forum where dick jokes are plentiful. If you don't have a sense of humor or have sensitivities about "dong" humor, don't bother.

Other than that, we are looking for hearthlings that can give and take insults and help. We need any and all jobs filled.

Seriously, don't bother me about village information. We don't want you.

[melzar]

lol

[vincent9567]

i get it its a dick joke

[squible]

Sounds Like a cool town. I would like to join.

[Encephalon]

Seems a little limp, perhaps if you stiffen up I might consider penetrating your walls.

[Chakravanti]

I think this village might stick around if they don't dick around.

[Thijssnl]

So weird, this is *exactly* the noobish kind of village I expected from WarpedWiseMan! Congrats.

[WarpedWiseMan]

So weird, this is *exactly* the noobish kind of village I expected from WarpedWiseMan! Congrats.

Who are you?

Fill out an application and when we have an opening for "Unfunny Asshat" I'll drop you a line. The position shall be coming available fairly soon.

[Atherman]

I think you lads deserve wolf capes for wittily using the word Cock in your town name.

[WarpedWiseMan]

Bump, because we are closing in on 15 active members and we need fresh blood to murder off the weaker less capable of our herd.

We still don't want you.