LadyV wrote:I am sorry if you find my review to be harsh but it is a very poorly arranged system for a game such as this.
Some of the things you are citing are actually in the U.S. Constitution, save the name change, (i.e. Section. 10. Article I).
Also, regarding the Chieftain comment—you cited that from Section. 3. Article I, but in Section. 2. Article I, it states,
Vaku wrote:When vacancies happen in the representation of a village, the Chieftain thereof shall issue election to fill such vacancies.
Election by the village (It's not optional by the Chieftain. They are compelled by law with the word, "shall")
And in Section. 4. Article I
Vaku wrote:The Times, Places and Manner of holding Elections for the Lawspeaker shall be prescribed in each village by the Legislature thereof; but the Council of Lawspeakers may at any time by law make or alter such regulations, except as to the places of choosing Lawspeakers.
And in the U.S. Contitution, Section. 4. Article. I.
Constitution of the United States of America wrote:The Times, Places and Manner of holding Elections for Senators and Representatives, shall be prescribed in each State by the Legislature thereof; but the Congress may at any time by Law make or alter such Regulations, except as to the Places of chusing Senators.
You can see here that not much is changed, except that I either forgot to or purposefully left out "Hirdsmen/Representatives", and if it was purposeful, I can't recall why I made that move. xD
LadyV wrote:Oh how nice nice a fife to rule as you wish and as long as you pay your taxes and are good servants to the king do what you want.
Also, I removed any mention of clauses that require money collected by a tax. In fact, it is less expensive to run this constitution than that of the United States.
In the U.S. Constitution, Section. 6. Article. I.
Constitution of the United States of America wrote:The Senators and Representatives shall receive a Compensation for their Services, to be ascertained by Law, and paid out of the Treasury of the United States. They shall in all Cases, except Treason, Felony and Breach of the Peace, be privileged from Arrest during their Attendance at the Session of their respective Houses, and in going to and returning from the same; and for any Speech or Debate in either House, they shall not be questioned in any other Place.
And in, Section. 1. Article. II.
Constitution of the United States of America wrote:The President shall, at stated Times, receive for his Services, a Compensation, which shall neither be increased nor diminished during the Period for which he shall have been elected, and he shall not receive within that Period any other Emolument from the United States, or any of them.
A part I kept, though does not call for mandatory tax, because the action itself is not required is here, in Section. 2. Article II
Vaku wrote:The Sovereign shall have power to full up all vacancies that may happen during the recess of the Council of Lawspeakers, by granting commissions which shall expire at the end of their next session.
It is found in the same place as the U.S. Constitution. Lots of things in this document are identical. One of the nice things I did was make it grammatically correct regarding genders, often using the phrase "his or her" whereas in the U.S. Constitution you only ever see "He". No evil sex discrimination inherently here.
At any rate. I appreciate that you are challenging this document and the claims I have written. You can be sure that come World 8 or sooner I will have a fresh document that is built from scratch, and hopefully will have the support of ingame mechanics that, in the words of Yolan, "provide emergent complexity."
Thank you LadyV, I will be reviewing your post a few times more and consider changes towards my subsequent schemes.